Fucking sucks.

Lindar lost his job. Now I get to wait and see if we're going to become homeless, or if the jobs we're trying to get will magically be gotten, or if some third solution comes along. Yes, I said "we're". I doubt I'll be able to get a job, and I know I won't be able to keep one, but trying isn't going to hurt, and it's better to have one for a little while than to not get it at all.

I don't know what's going to happen. Lindar doesn't seem worried, and I'm trying to stay optimistic so as not to stress him out, but I'm very concerned about this, I think understandably so.

Maybe this is my chance to go do that thing I'm supposed to do. I mean, if we end up homeless, it won't really be a risk anymore, will it? I can just go. I suppose that if I take the first step, then the next ones will become evident, one by one. I really wish I could just know whatever the fuck it is, but I'm probably not going to, and I imagine it's for a good reason. Still, it would be nice to have some idea of what exactly is expected of me.

Also, I have the flu. Fucking sucks. I HATE being sick. The shitty part is that every time I start feeling a little bit better, I start getting up and walking around and doing things again, which makes me worse again. I need to just rest, relax, and recuperate, but I hate lying around doing nothing, especially after the decision I recently made to make myself healthy again. I was going about it wrong before, but I'm sure I can do it now. I mean, now that I've actually got some sort of motivation, because I didn't before.

But for now, I need to rest and get better, and that involves actually resting. I might take another bath. I've bathed enough times today, I'm sure, but I've been told that heat helps to get rid of the flu, and it would also feel nice. Now if I can just get my pathetic ass up.